Toolkits for Tough Times: Going on deployment

Understanding the challenges of overseas deployment, away from friends and family.

Article written by RAF PS&SWS Welfare Officer, Rebekah Marshall.

Although it might not make the news, there is never a time that UK Armed Forces personnel, including those of the RAF, are not deployed somewhere in the world. It could be Ascension, the Middle East, or closer to home in Europe.  And although it's what they're trained to do and may have already experienced, it still takes some mental and physical strength to adapt, and quickly to it, or in a word, resilience. 


Resilience – we all have it in us, but doesn’t it feel like we are able to cope better at certain times than others? Then you throw in deployment for serving personnel and military families and it can all feel a bit like we are just about surviving. However, during this period of change, resilience is developed and you can manage to adapt to the changes, create healthy coping strategies and identify opportunities. 

So, what are some of the common challenges serving personnel and military families face when deployment is on the cards?  

  • Isolation and loneliness
  • Stress (physical and mental)
  • Logistical issues e.g. household, childcare, pet care
  • Communication with loved ones
  • Civilian friends not understanding 

What are the most effective steps to take before deployment to prepare for the separation, emotions and practicalities alongside that? 

Prepare yourself – be practical and proactive and start to take steps towards any potential challenges. For example:   

  • Speak to your line manager/employer to discuss flexible working arrangements for a fixed period if needed. 
  • Reach out to family and friends in anticipation of needing some more support.  
  • Contacting a child’s school to make them aware that additional care might be needed e.g. Wrap Around Care or clubs.
  • Communicate to your partner/spouse about your needs as a couple. Be honest with each other and talk about how you can feel connected if contact is not as frequent as you like.  

Talk it out – keep communication with family, friends and peers open about what is going on for you and share if you are finding it hard to cope. This is a common feeling and no matter what you are experiencing, you are not a burden! Avoiding how you are feeling can lead to burn out in the future. 

Time – give yourself time and space to adjust and develop a new routine. From there, create small, achievable goals or focus points to work towards. This could be an event you are looking forward to attending or even making it through to 5pm on Friday! Before you know it, you will be crossing off those days and weeks towards being reunited.  

Listen – if you are supporting someone who is coping with the challenges of deployment, listen to them, acknowledge how they are feeling but do not necessarily try and offer them solutions. Often, just being there and listening is enough. Be aware of signs they might not be coping; they might cancel meet ups, reduce communication and give you an “I’m fine” response.  

Access support – whether that be your family, friends or colleagues, do not forget about the wider Armed Forces community that is available. If you are unsure where to even start looking for support, try the following:

 

Then finally…Welcome home! 

But why doesn’t it always feel as good as you thought it would? 

Just remember that coming home from deployment is not always smooth sailing! It will be another readjustment period for everyone. Patience will be needed whilst new routines are developed and connections are re-established.

Again, talk and listen to each other. Keep those lines of communications open and if you REALLY don’t like where the plates are now kept in the cupboard, they can always be moved back! 

 

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