Live ChatArticle written by SSAFA Welfare Officer, RAF South Team, Sara Lavelle.
In this article Sara explores the stresses of the Christmas period, and how they affect military personnel and families - and provides some tips to help you have a very Merry Christmas.
Christmas: the most wonderful time of the year?
Whether single, in a couple, or in a family, Christmas can be a stressful time, a hard time, and it’s only compounded if you’re in the Armed Forces.
First off, being apart from loved ones is the big one. If someone’s deployed over the holidays, it’s hard for everyone. You miss the usual traditions, and that distance can feel really heavy.
Then there’s the stress factor. Military life is unpredictable – deployment schedules change, moves happen out of the blue and that uncertainty adds pressure during what’s supposed to be a relaxing time. And if you’ve got children? Imagine juggling Christmas dinner, entertaining relatives, wrapping gifts, and keeping the little ones happy – all solo. It’s even more challenging for parents of children with special educational needs. If you’ve had to do this , or are going to be, then hats off to you; you’re achieving even more.
Who needs extra support?
Newly bereaved families often find the season overwhelming. Children with a deployed parent really feel the absence, and new parents might be missing those “first Christmas” milestones. Families adjusting to life outside the military for the first time can feel lost without that built-in community. And let’s not forget spouses holding the fort alone, veterans or serving personnel struggling with mental health or loneliness, or both, and anyone facing financial hardship. Christmas can be a pressure cooker for all of them.
What about traditions?
When someone’s away repeatedly, they can start to feel left out of family traditions. Video calls and presents help, but they’re no substitute for being there in person. That emotional toll is real.
Community matters
Military groups often organise holiday meals, events, and Facebook meetups so families don’t feel alone. Sometimes they even pitch in with childcare or meals. That sense of belonging is huge – it’s like having a second family, which is what’s often said about the RAF and the other services.
Coping tips
There are various things that could help ease the pressure and feeling of being overwhelmed.
- Lean on your support network - whether it is friends, family or community groups
- Practice self-care - try and get outside each day, meditate or try some yoga, there are loads of ideas online
- Use tech to stay connected - video calls, letters, even old-school “blueys”
- Consider volunteering - helping others in need could lift your spirits too
- Find an outlet - even if it’s just watching some cheesy made-for-TV Christmas films, and festive TV shows, going for a run or a bike ride.
But most importantly, set realistic expectations. Christmas doesn’t have to be perfect.
Need help?
Look out for on-station events, SSAFA, the RAF Benevolent Fund, Samaritans, Operation Christmas Box, FamilyLine, and local community centres.
There’s support out there and you’re not alone.
Here’s what we want people to know: military families are incredibly strong and adaptable. They handle challenges most of the civilian world can’t imagine, but a little extra understanding goes a long way.
And however you celebrate it, all of us at the RAF Personal Support and Social Work Service wish you a very happy Christmas.